The Essential Affirmation Process
There is a specific affirmation process that most people miss. Typically, when people first learn about affirmations, they jump right in: "I am wealthy!" They say it over and over. Six-months later, they are frustrated that nothing happened. What went wrong? When "I am wealthy!" was affirmed, it most likely competed with the following thoughts:
I have no control over the events in my life.
There is not enough money to go around.
I am poor.
I have debt.
And on, and on...
We don’t affirm the words we say, we affirm how we feel about those words. If your positive words feel like a lie, you are affirming the opposite of what you are intending to affirm.
For affirmations to have power,
they have to be congruent with your other existing beliefs.
So, first things first, determine an area of your life that you’d like to improve and establish what you believe about that area. Make a list and include everything. This is the first step in the affirmation process. You have to know where you are starting so you can map a path to get to where you want to go.
Look over your list of beliefs and determine which ones support your goals and which ones limit achieving your goal. For those that are limiting, ask “is this belief true?” So often we believe something based on our impressions, assumptions and experiences, not necessarily on reality. As an example, if you want to improve your finances, but think that “you have no control over the events in your life” this belief could have been picked up when you lost your job or had another financial hardship but doesn’t mean that you don’t have any control.
If you find that your belief isn’t true, determine what is true instead. To use our example above, you may recognize that you do have some control in your life: how you set your budget, where you live, how often you eat out, what you buy, etc… This would lead to an affirmation of “I can control my finances.”
Remember to find a statement that feels true for you right at this moment. One of the most important keys to remember in the affirmation process is to pay attention to how you physically feel when you speak an affirmation. The feeling our body returns to us when we say an affirmation, tells us if we believe it or not.
No matter how hard you mentally want to believe you are wealthy if you do not feel wealth when you affirm, "I am wealthy." you are really intending lack. This made a huge difference in the way I practiced affirmations. Once I learned to watch the feeling associated with my words, I saw what I was really intending.
Continue to look over your list of limiting beliefs and
that feel true that support behaviors and thoughts you want to have once you have achieved your goal.
To make an affirmation that feels untrue believable, you can put the words: “choose,” “potential” or “willing” in the affirmation to make it true for you. "I can control my finances” would become “I am willing to control my finances” or “I choose to control my finances.”
Disclaimer: this process may be especially intense for some people. If you find that you have some powerful emotions and beliefs to work through, please seek the guidance of a professional counselor which can help clear out some of your more deeply rooted beliefs.
The last step in the affirmation process is repetition. Once you have a few affirmations aimed to support your endeavors, memorize them and repeat them to yourself (silently or out loud) whenever you feel old thoughts and behaviors emerging. You are reminding yourself of how you would like to think and act in your life. These new thoughts and behaviors will create
new neural connections
that will form habits that lead to your goals.
It is very easy to slip back into limiting ways of thinking and behaving. Affirmations are a process that takes time to become ingrained. Be patient with yourself. Have fun with your affirmations. Since we run
mostly on autopilot,
the affirmations process is designed to wake us up to making conscious (vs. automatic) choices. Your affirmations are the reminders of the choices you want to make. The more consistently you remind yourself, the easier your new life will emerge.
Affirmation Process Summary
STEP 5: Say Affirmation with Repetition
Remind yourself of your conscious choices with affirmations.
STEP 4: Write Affirmations
Create affirmations that counter your limiting beliefs and feel true.
STEP 3: Find Limiting Beliefs
Determine which beliefs support and which hinder your goals.
STEP 2: List Your Beliefs
Take inventory of your beliefs that support current thoughts & habits.
STEP 1: Choose an Area of Life to Focus On
Relationships, finances, career, spirituality, health, etc…
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